Dating while in the army

I agreed and we met and hit it off. He ended up sweeping me off my feet and regardless of everyone telling me I was crazy, we married on May 23, It was the best thing I ever did and I have never been happier. I am in the Navy and, at the time, had just gotten home from a deployment.

We started to talk and hit it off right off the bat. I asked her to coffee the next day and we went on from there.

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Three months after asking her to be my girlfriend she became my wife. I never thought I would find my true love online but it goes to show anything can happen to anyone, anywhere. I have never been happier and look forward to our bright and crazy future. I loved him so much and he made me so happy so of course I would wait. When I first started online dating, I was nervous about meeting someone. Then, after a few weeks I got a message from Phil. The first time we met we hung out at the mall near his apartment.

But I liked him right away, and as time went on we really got to know each other.

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The second time we met I actually stayed at his apartment until 4: He drove me home and said goodnight without making any moves and I really appreciated it. He had manners and that really impressed me. And that was really the start of our relationship. After a few months of dating, we were engaged in March. He had joined the army and was leaving for basic training in April and I knew I would wait for him.

He graduated from basic training August 8th and had two weeks left for Stryker training.

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When he came home on August 27, we were married. With Phil by my side I feel like I can do anything and he would say the same. We like to say that we found our other half.

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I had waited eight months for a man I had only gone out with once. It was one of the best decisions of my life. I had been in some horrible relationships in the past; in fact, I had just gotten out of one. I was not really looking for a relationship, but I went ahead and created an online dating account for the heck of it. I was on the verge of deleting it after a month when Josh sent me a chat request. I accepted it even though I thought he would be just like everyone else.

It turns out I was very wrong. God tends to send you miracles in unexpected moments. We talked for a few months while he was stationed in North Carolina for Coast Guard training, and he got a two week leave before he was going to be shipped off to Bahrain for a year.

Well, I told him I would wait. It will give me time to focus on my studies. As part of his leave, he flew to Florida to get his car so he could drive to Ohio to visit his family before he left for a year.

He told me that he would come see me on his way up to Ohio. He drove four hours out of the way to see me. He ended up spending the day with me.

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We went out to eat and went to the movies. It was one of the best dates I have ever been on.

After the movie I got in my car and he got in his and we went our separate ways. I was freaking out the whole time I was driving away and thinking to myself, You idiot! Well we talked for an additional two weeks. At that time some other guys were aggravating me on Facebook, so I put that I was in a relationship to get them to leave me alone.

He saw it too and I told him why I did it. Then he asked if I minded if he put he was in a relationship too. Most deployments last at least six months. Sure, you say, this is only half of a year. But think of the things that can occur in that half-year. You may become involved with a new club or social network. You may build a strong relationship with a new friend. You may win an award or run in a marathon.

You need to have The Talk. Before the deployment begins, the two of you need to sit down and discuss your future--even if your relationship has just begun. It is only fair to both you and your military partner that each of you know where the other one stands. You need to consider whether or not the two of you will remain exclusive or if you agree to date other people. You should also consider whether or not you are willing to wait for this person, or if you are able to get to know him through long-distance communication.

Push the hold button. Maybe you should consider putting the relationship on hold. Many new couples make the decision to live their individual lives apart from the one another while the military member is on a deployment. This gives both parties the freedom to meet new people and experience new events without any remorse or responsibility to the other person.

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This also allows the civilian girlfriend to really evaluate whether or not she wants to commit herself to the military lifestyle. How much and how often?

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You should mutually agree how often you will communicate, and which modes of contact you will employ. You may be more comfortable sending e-mails since you are on opposite sides of the world and, therefore, have completely different waking hours. You may need to renegotiate this as your service member finds out exactly what kind of communication is available. Many of these military spouses have been sitting right where you are and will be a wealth of knowledge in your journey through deployment.


If you decide yours is a relationship worth pursuing, it is important that you gather information from others who have already learned from their own deployment mistakes. What happens if you meet someone else? You need to prepare yourself for the possibility that one, or both of you, may meet someone else during this separation. You need to establish your boundaries prior to his leaving.

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